From the darkness to the light

     FROM THE DARKNESS TO THE LIGHT

“The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of deep darkness a light has dawned.” (Isaiah 9:2)

This is my story: “The Passage from Darkness to Light.”

Because He has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of His beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins. (Colossians 1:13-14)

I was born a Muslim, and my whole family is Muslim. I was circumcised according to Islamic law.

I grew up in a Muslim area; my neighbors and all my friends were Muslims. My parents enrolled my brothers, sisters, and me in an Islamic school.

My brother was killed by a Christian sniper’s bullet during the Lebanese civil war “between Muslims and Christians.”

Because of this, my parents and family developed a deep hatred for Christians. My parents always told us: “You must take revenge on the Christians for your brother’s blood. Don’t forget that Christians are our enemies and also the enemies of all Muslims.”

My family raised me to be a devout Muslim. Every day, they would send me to the mosque to pray and study the Qur’an, Islamic creed, and on top of that, they told me never to greet Christians. Any communication with Christians was forbidden. According to them, Christians are polytheists because they worship statues, images, and the cross, and they are unbelievers and polytheists (meaning they believe in more than one god).

When I was about seven years old, I saw myself in a dream or vision in the mosque. Then I saw a large hand tearing the roof of the mosque and reaching out to me. I knew it was the hand of God calling me, but to what? I did not know.

I went to my mother to tell her about the dream, but she scolded me and told me not to tell anyone about the dream because God has no hand.

The vision or dream remained in my mind. I could not stop thinking about it and wondering what it meant. I asked many questions of my family, at the mosque, and at school.

The Lord said to Moses: “When my glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft of the rock and cover you with my hand until I have passed by.” (Exodus 33:22-23)

The book that changed my life and saved me from eternal death is the great book, the Holy Book—the Bible.

The story began when I was outside my house. I was unhappy, sad, discouraged, and despondent. As I was approaching my house, I found some books on the ground near the trash bin. The title of one of the books caught my attention; it was written in bright red letters, and the title was "Read and Rejoice."

That day, I was very depressed, so I decided to take one of the books hoping it would lift my spirits. At first, I thought it was a book of jokes. I entered my house to read the book I found on the ground near the trash bin.

I took a shower and ate, and when I finished, I went to my room and started reading that book I found near the trash.

When I opened the book, I felt a strange feeling. I felt inner joy and peace in my heart, and I no longer felt sadness or discouragement. I read the book, but I did not find any jokes in it. From that book, I gained new knowledge about Jesus (the prophet ‘Isa in Arabic and among Muslims).

I found it a strange book. I closed it and threw it aside. I said to myself: "Oh my God! What is this book? God does not have a son, He did not marry, and He has no wife" (the Qur’an, Islamic creed, says God has no child nor spouse: "Say, He is Allah, [Who is] One, Allah, the Eternal Refuge. He neither begets nor is born, Nor is there to Him any equivalent." [Surat Al-Ikhlas]).

I realized the book belonged to some religion, but I did not know which one. I did not know that the book was the Holy Book (the Bible), because I had never seen a Bible before in my life.

During that period, I kept thinking about throwing it in the trash again. Then I said to myself, "It’s better to burn the book, because maybe someone will see it and read it." I thought I should go to the trash bin to burn the other books too. I went to the kitchen to get a box of matches, but I could not find any. I went to my neighbor to ask for a matchstick, but at that moment, someone knocked on the door. I opened it, and it was a friend of mine. He had a problem with his car engine, so he came to ask for my help. We went together to try to fix the car. After we fixed the problem, I returned home. I had forgotten about the book and what I planned to do with it.

That night, I could not sleep. I returned sad, and the depression I had felt earlier that morning came back. I felt a severe pain in my head. I lay down to sleep, but when I couldn’t, I asked my mother to read me some verses from the Qur’an. She read Surat Al-Falaq and Al-Fatiha for me, but reading these verses did not help me sleep. I went back to my room again, talked to God, and read a little from the Qur’an, but what I read did not help.

Suddenly, I remembered that book I had read before. I searched for the book and found it. I opened it again to read it, and once more, I felt the same feelings I had when I first read it. I felt peace in my heart, and the depression was gone, and my headache disappeared. I felt relieved (I felt that God wanted me to read the book).

There was something strange about that book because before reading it, I was not well. But when I read it, I felt a great improvement and inner peace. I read the whole book, but it was very strange to me because it talked about Christ and that He is the Son of God, that He is the Lord, and that He died on the cross. I could not imagine some people believing that God has a son, which means God got married, while the Qur’an in Surat Al-Ikhlas says God has no child and no spouse.

At the same time, I found it a beautiful book because it spoke about love, forgiveness, and tolerance. I did not find anything like these things in the Qur’an, but I could not understand what kind of book it was because I had never seen a Bible before.

I closed the book and put it on the table, and after that, I felt sleepy and slept. I saw in a dream a vision like the one I had seen when I was a child.

I went to a friend to ask him about the book. He told me: "This book is for Christians, and it is the corrupted Bible, and Christians are polytheists (meaning they believe in more than one god). This book says that the prophet Jesus is the Son of God, but God did not marry and has no son."

I told him I know that our Qur’an says that, and he said the true Bible also says Jesus is a prophet and speaks about Prophet Muhammad, but the corrupted Bible does not mention Prophet Muhammad.

The Christian creed differs from the Muslim creed because Christians worship three gods, but Muslims worship only one God. Christians drink wine and eat pork, but Muslims do not drink wine nor eat pork.

I went home and kept the book in my bag to show it to my friend’s father, because he was an elder in one of the mosques, and he knew more about it than my friend did.

I forgot about the book and forgot to show it to my friend’s father, the elder.

After a while, as I was going to the store, I met a young man (I believe that the Lord Jesus had sent him to me, and it was never a coincidence).

This young man was asking about an address. He approached me and asked about that address and said, “I have been here for an hour searching for this address, and I couldn’t find it.” He asked me if I could guide him to that address.

I told him, “Yes, certainly, no problem.”

He said, “Thank you, Jesus! Finally, I found someone who will help me.”

While we were going to that address, I asked him, “Are you a Christian?” (I asked because he said, “Thank you, Jesus.”)

He said, “Yes, I am a Christian.” I told him, “I would like to know something about Christianity. I have some questions about the Christian faith and the Gospel. Please, could you answer these questions and inquiries and explain some of the notes I have written down?”

He said, “It would be my pleasure.”

So, we set an appointment to meet for that purpose. Then I guided him to the address he was looking for.

I was waiting for that meeting with that young man eagerly, with curiosity and a strong desire beyond description, to learn about the Christian religion and the Gospel.

I had a deep feeling that I was about to discover something important that would change my life forever and transport me from one world to another.

Because of my enthusiasm and insistence on learning more about Christianity and the Holy Book, the Gospel, which gave me inner peace when I read it for the first time, I felt that the waiting period was long, as if it were decades.

Finally, I met my new friend. He asked me why I wanted to know about the Christian faith and the Holy Book, the Gospel.

I described to him what had happened to me before I found the Gospel, the Holy Book, and after I found it, and about the strange feeling I had when I opened the Gospel, the Holy Book, for the first time.

Then we began the discussion.

I asked him: Do they really believe that the Prophet Jesus is the Son of God and that He is God? How is that possible? That would mean that God married the Virgin Mary and had a sexual relationship with her.

He said to me: "Son of God" does not mean that God had a sexual relationship with the holy Virgin Mary. The meaning of "Son of God" is figurative, a spiritual fatherhood, not a physiological one. Then he said to me: You said "Virgin Mary" — virgin means that she had no sexual relations with anyone. Let me give you an example: Many people say to me, "You are the son of Syria or the son of Lebanon." That does not mean that Lebanon or Syria married another country and gave birth to me.

We call any Christian "Son of God." Moreover, that does not mean that God has sexual relations with our mothers.

I said to him: You say that Jesus is the Son of God. That means He is also God, and that means you worship more than one God, as the Quran says.

He said: We believe in one God and worship only one God. Jesus Himself said: "The most important commandment is this: Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one." (Gospel of Mark 12:29)

But the divine nature of God means that God has three attributes: the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. These three attributes are called the Holy Trinity. The Trinity means three in one and one in three. God is the Father, and Jesus is the Word of God. The Quran itself confirms that Jesus is the Word of God in Surah Al-Imran (3:44-47), where the angels say:

"O Mary, indeed Allah gives you good tidings of a word from Him, whose name will be the Messiah, Jesus, the son of Mary, held in honor in this world and the Hereafter and among those brought near [to Allah]. He will speak to the people in the cradle and in maturity and will be of the righteous."

Mary said: "My Lord, how will I have a child when no man has touched me?" Allah said: "Such is Allah; He creates what He wills. When He decrees a matter, He only says to it, 'Be,' and it is."

Moreover, the Holy Spirit is the Spirit of God.

He said to me: You are a human; you have a body, a spirit, and a mind. Does that mean you are three persons?

I said: Definitely not, I am one person, not three.

He said to me: The Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit are components of one God — "The Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit are one God."

I asked: You say Jesus is God and died on the cross. How can God die? I was told God is eternal and never dies. You know that. Then he continued: Yes, I know that, but death means that the spirit separates from the body. When Jesus died on the cross, His human body died, and after three days He rose from the dead. Then He appeared to many people and His disciples, and after forty days He ascended to heaven.

I asked him: Why all this?

He said: Jesus came to earth and died on the cross to save our souls from eternal damnation.

I asked why? He said: Because we are sinners. When Adam and Eve sinned, sin entered the entire human race and brought eternal death to us. We are born in sin, and it corrupts our relationship with God. We needed salvation from sin through Jesus Christ to restore our relationship with God. To restore this relationship, we needed a sacrifice, because the Holy Book—the Gospel—says: "For the wages of sin is death." Moreover, sins can never be forgiven without a sacrifice. But what kind of sacrifice? A sacrifice without sin, without defect, without blemish—a perfect sacrifice. Who is without sin? Who is perfect?

I said to him: No one except God alone is perfect.

He said: Yes, therefore God sent His only Son to sacrifice Himself for our sins.

I asked why God sent Jesus to die for us. He said: Because God loves us. That is why He sent His only Son to die on the cross as a ransom for humanity; therefore, we call Him Jesus the Savior because He saved us from sin and eternal death.

After this meeting, my thoughts scattered, and I was very hesitant. I asked myself what I should do. Should I believe what my new friend told me, or what the Quran, my family, the sheikh in the mosque, the people around me, my neighbors, and friends say?

I wondered: Do my family and friends say Christianity is false and distorted just because they are Muslims?

While my new friend told me Christianity is the true religion and gave me evidence from both the Quran and the Gospel (the Holy Book).

Did he say that because he is Christian?

But my family, the sheikh in the mosque, and my friends did not present a single proof to support what the Quran claims or what they say about Christians and the Gospel (the Holy Book).

However, my new friend provided me with evidence from the Gospel and the Quran. He based his words on both scriptures, and his words affected me.

I found his words logical.

I asked myself, whom should I trust: my new friend, or my family, my sheikh, my friends, my teacher, and the university?

It was a very difficult choice for me, because I had learned at school, from my parents, and from the mosque that God has no son, and that Jesus is just an ordinary prophet, not a Lord. (I used to think that Jesus was a prophet, not the Son of God, because I was born and raised on these poisoned, satanic concepts.)

I was very afraid for my spiritual future, for God’s judgment, and for eternal death. I found that the best one I could trust was God Himself.

Therefore, I prayed to Him and asked: “O Almighty God, Creator of the universe and all worlds and all creation, O God, guide me to the right path, to the truth, show me which book is the true book, grant me wisdom and spiritual insight so I may see the truth.”

Why I Became a Christian

I began to verify and compare between the Qur’an and the Gospel, Islamic creed and Christian creed. I used to read the Qur’an and the Gospel every day at the same time to understand the difference between them and to determine which one is the book of truth.

After months of research, scrutiny, and deep reading, I found the difference and the truth: the Islamic creed contains no love, no forgiveness, no tolerance; it contains punishment, retribution, revenge, terrorism, violence, killing, theft, looting, and robbery under the name of economic war and spoils of enemies.

While the Christian creed contains love, forgiveness, repentance, tolerance, peace, humanity, and humility.

The Qur’an, or the book written by the Prophet of the Muslims, says:

“Punish your enemies, fight against the unbelievers” (they call anyone who is not Muslim a disbeliever):

Surat Al-Baqarah (2:191-194):

“And kill them wherever you find them, and expel them from where they expelled you; and persecution is worse than killing. And do not fight them at the Sacred Mosque until they fight you there. But if they fight you, then kill them. Such is the recompense of the disbelievers. (191) But if they cease, then indeed Allah is Forgiving and Merciful. (192) And fight them until there is no [more] fitnah and [until] religion [i.e., worship] is for Allah. But if they cease, then there is to be no aggression except against the oppressors. (193) The sacred month is for the sacred month, and for [all] violations is legal retribution. So whoever has assaulted you, then assault him in the same way that he has assaulted you. And fear Allah and know that Allah is with those who fear Him.” (194)

Surat Al-Ma’idah (5:35-45):

“And We prescribed for them therein a life for a life, an eye for an eye, a nose for a nose, an ear for an ear, a tooth for a tooth, and for wounds is legal retribution. But whoever gives [up his right] as charity, it is an expiation for him. And whoever does not judge by what Allah has revealed - then it is those who are the wrongdoers.”

But the Lord Jesus says:

“As for me, I say to you, love your enemies. Bless those who curse you. Do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who mistreat you.”

(Gospel of Matthew 5:44-45)

As for the Prophet of the Muslims, he waged many wars, raids, killed, slaughtered, plundered, and looted, and was always calling for wars under the name of conquests.

Surat Al-Anfal (8:55-65):

“O Prophet, urge the believers to fight. If there are among you twenty patient ones, they will overcome two hundred. And if there are among you a hundred, they will overcome a thousand of those who disbelieve because they are a people who do not understand.”

Surat Al-Ma’idah (5:32-36):

“The recompense of those who wage war against Allah and His Messenger and strive upon earth [to cause] corruption is none but that they be killed or crucified or that their hands and feet be cut off from opposite sides or that they be exiled from the land. That is for them a disgrace in this world; and for them in the Hereafter is a great punishment.”

The Lord Jesus did not wage any war; rather, he was called for peace, love, renouncing violence and killing (the Sermon on the Mount):

Gospel of Matthew (5:3-9):

“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called children of God.”

The Prophet of the Muslims forced people to accept his innovation and his religion, which he and those behind him created.

Surat At-Tawbah (9:25-30):

“Then Allah sent down His tranquility upon His Messenger and upon the believers and sent down soldiers [angels] whom you did not see and punished those who disbelieved. And that is the recompense of the disbelievers.”

But the Lord Jesus came with love, peace, and mercy. Jesus did not force anyone to accept Him; rather, He gave us all free will to accept or reject Him.

Gospel of Luke (10:5-11):

“Whatever house you enter, first say, ‘Peace to this house.’ 6 If a son of peace is there, your peace will rest upon him; if not, it will return to you. 7 Stay in that house, eating and drinking whatever they give you, for the worker deserves his wages. Do not move around from house to house. 8 Whenever you enter a city and they welcome you, eat what is set before you, 9 heal the sick who are there, and tell them, ‘The kingdom of God has come near to you.’ 10 But when you enter a town and they do not welcome you, go into its streets and say, 11 ‘Even the dust of your town we wipe from our feet as a warning to you. Yet be sure of this: The kingdom of God has come near.’”

Jesus performed many miracles, raised the dead, healed the sick, and cast out evil spirits from those possessed by demons.

The Qur’an itself confirms that the Lord Jesus created the birds from clay (creation is a divine attribute belonging to God alone), breathed into them, healed the sick, and raised the dead (raising the dead is also a divine attribute, meaning no one can do it except God, thus Jesus is God).

Surat Aal-Imran (3:45-50):

“When the angels said, ‘O Mary, indeed Allah gives you good tidings of a word from Him, whose name will be the Messiah, Jesus, the son of Mary, distinguished in this world and the Hereafter and among those brought near [to Allah]. 46 He will speak to the people in the cradle and in maturity and will be of the righteous.’ 47 [Jesus] will teach him the Scripture and wisdom and the Torah and the Gospel. 48 And [make him] a messenger to the Children of Israel, [who will say], ‘Indeed I have come to you with a sign from your Lord, that I will create for you from clay [that which is] like the form of a bird, then I will breathe into it, and it will be a bird…’”

However, the Prophet of the Muslims did not show any miracles except those related to terror, killing, robbery, and plundering. Also, the Prophet of the Muslims married thirteen women; one of them was nine years old at the time of marriage.

The Quran itself is contradictory. Some chapters affirm that Jesus died on the cross, such as

Surah Maryam (19:33): "And peace be upon me the day I was born, and the day I die, and the day I am raised alive."

"The day I die" means the day I am crucified.

And Surah Al-Imran (3:55): "When Allah said, 'O Jesus, indeed I will take you and raise you to Myself and purify you from those who disbelieve and make those who follow you [in submission to Allah alone] superior to those who disbelieve until the Day of Resurrection. Then to Me is your return, and I will judge between you concerning that in which you used to differ.'"

And Surah Al-Baqarah (2:87): "And We gave Moses the Scripture and followed him up with a succession of messengers; and We gave Jesus, the son of Mary, clear proofs and supported him with the Holy Spirit. But is it [not] that whenever a messenger came to you, [O Children of Israel], with what your souls did not desire, you were arrogant? And a party [of messengers] you denied and another party you killed."

Here lies the contradiction to absolve the Jews from the blood of the Messiah:

Surah An-Nisa (4:155-157): "And [for] their saying, 'Indeed, we have killed the Messiah, Jesus, the son of Mary, the messenger of Allah.' And they did not kill him, nor did they crucify him; but [another] was made to resemble him to them. And indeed, those who differ over it are in doubt about it. They have no knowledge of it except the following of assumption. And they did not kill him, for certain."

I also began researching the contradictory and strange personality of the Prophet Muhammad, and likewise the contradictions and inconsistencies in the Quran, its symbolic and obscure verses and statements.

In the Quran, there are many words that bear no relation to the Arabic language, such as: Kaf Ha Ya ‘Ain Sad (كهيعص) and other words, symbols, and riddles.

Moreover, the Quran frequently mentions the Children of Israel, the Jews, their kings, and their prophets, even though its narration states that the blessed offspring or the promised progeny, or the one who inherits Abraham, is the offspring of Ishmael—not Isaac. According to the accounts of Muhammad, the Prophet of the Muslims, the offspring of Ishmael is the blessed lineage, and the prophets come from the lineage of Ishmael, not from the lineage of Isaac. So why does it mention, repeat, emphasize, and increase the references to the lineage of Isaac?

It is to make the Arabs obey, sanctify, and revere the Jews, their kings, and their prophets.

The story that the Arabs descend from Ishmael (the Arabs are descendants of the Assyrians) is a lie propagated by Muhammad, the Prophet of the Muslims, to make the Arabs obedient slaves to the Jews. In other words, Muhammad used the Arabs to fight the enemies of the Jews.

Muhammad spread false reports claiming that the Jews are the cousins of the Jews.

Muhammad also forbade what the Jews forbid and permitted what the Jews permit — such as the prohibition of eating pork, not touching dogs, polygamy, divorce, and so forth.

Furthermore, Muslim prayer is basically a copied version of Jewish prayer.

I researched a lot in books and about the biography of the Prophet Muhammad but found nothing indicating anything about his life before Islam.

All that is known about him before founding the religion of Islam is that he married his first wife, Khadijah, who was more than twenty years older than him. The question that every Muslim fears to ask is: Where did he marry her?

Meaning, was he belonging to some religion, or was he an atheist, which implies he committed adultery with her?

But the question is: If he belonged to a certain religion, what was that religion?

Either Christianity or Judaism.

I researched more deeply into his origins and those of his family until I found some old books talking about groups of highway robbers and desert bandits who called themselves the Hajareans — meaning the children of Hagar. These books and references indicate that a man from the Arabian Peninsula was leading these gangs and criminals who attacked and raided caravans, terrorized Christian churches and monasteries, especially in the city of Iliya (Jerusalem).

And this man is Muhammad Hashim.

I dwelled a lot on the names Muhammad, Ahmad, and Hashim.

In the Arabic language, these names did not exist and no one knew of them before Muhammad and his religion appeared.

Since Islam is basically a copied version of Judaism, then there must be a connection between Muhammad and the Jews.

I wondered, what is this connection? And why did Muhammad and his religion destroy Christianity, spread Islam, and bring the Jews into Iliya (Jerusalem)?

I asked myself many questions. I prayed and asked the Lord Jesus to help me uncover this mystery.

After long research, I realized the following:

First, the names Muhammad and Ahmad are translated from Hebrew into Arabic (like the name Judah translated from Hebrew into Arabic). That is, Muhammad or Ahmad means Judah. Meaning Muhammad is Judah — that is, he is a disguised Jew.

Second, Muhammad’s family name is Hashim. The name Hashim does not exist at all in the Arabic language.

I researched and checked Hebrew dictionaries (at the time, the internet was not widespread) and found that Hashim means in Hebrew Ha-El Ism — meaning “The Name.”

What name?

In Judaism, Jews are forbidden to pronounce the name of their God except in the Holy of Holies — the Tent of Meeting where the Ark of the Covenant is kept. Therefore, they say Ha-El Ism (“The Name”) instead of the divine name.

Third, Muhammad claimed that he went to Iliya (“Jerusalem”) — Muhammad changed its name to Al-Quds because the Jews believe the Holy of Holies is in Iliya — and then ascended to heaven. (Of course, he did not actually go to Iliya “Jerusalem” nor did he ascend anywhere.)

Why did he make this claim?

He asked his caliph, Umar ibn al-Khattab, to build a “Jami‘” (the word “Jami‘” is translated from Hebrew into Arabic and means “synagogue”) for him in Iliya (“Jerusalem”) and specified the location of the “Jami‘” (synagogue) for him. This place was actually a garbage dump used by the Christian inhabitants of Iliya (“Jerusalem”).

Why this specific location?

Because the Jewish rabbis believed that this was the site where the Jewish Temple, the Holy of Holies, had been built.

The puzzling question is: How can he be a disguised Jew and build a mosque on the ruins of the Holy of Holies (according to the Jews)?

The answer is: When Jews enter the area they believe to be the site of the Holy of Holies—the Jewish Temple—they remove their shoes or sandals to avoid bringing impurity to the place, according to their belief. Similarly, Muslims remove their shoes/sandals when entering the mosque.

In other words, Muhammad “protected” or removed the impurity (according to his claim) from the area believed to be the site of their temple and Holy of Holies.

The mosque and the synagogue are basically identical copies in form, both inside and out, including ablution and prayer rituals.

Thus, he fulfilled many parts of the Jews’ dreams and plans: the destruction of Christianity, the recruitment of Muslims to work, fight, and kill in the name of Jewish projects and schemes.

As for the stories of Muhammad’s wars against the Jews, they are nothing but lies to deflect suspicion from him and his true identity.

All of Muhammad’s and his successors’ wars were against Christians, pagans, and idol worshipers. Meanwhile, the Jews lived in comfort under Islamic rule. Christians were forced to convert to Muhammad’s religion, which is a copied version of Judaism intended to Judaize non-Jews into obedient servants of the Jews. Christians who refused to convert were beheaded.

The meaning of Islam is to make others submit by the sword. Islam does not mean peace. There is no peace or love in the Quran or Islamic doctrine, only terror, killing, slaughter, rape, looting, and theft.

After comparing everything, the matter became clear to me.

But at the same time, I was afraid, confused, and hesitant.

One day, while reading the Bible, I came upon words spoken by the Lord Jesus:

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)

I felt as if these words were said for me, and for all the oppressed, the wronged, the deprived, and the weary.

I wept bitterly. I knelt in my room, raised my hands to heaven, and prayed:

“Lord Jesus, if you are truly the Son of God, enter my heart and change my life. I do not understand everything, but I trust in you.”

At that moment, I felt a deep peace fill my entire being. It was as if something heavy had been lifted from my shoulders and chest.

I began a new life—a life full of light—after having been drowned in darkness.

Since that moment, my life completely changed. I no longer went to the mosque, nor did I continue to participate in the hatred I was raised with. Instead, I began searching for true Christians—those who believe in love, forgiveness, and mercy, not in war, hatred, and revenge.

One day, I met a Christian clergyman.

He was a calm young man, his smile full of peace and love.

At first, I spoke to him fearfully, but he welcomed me and shook my hand with a love I had never known before.

I told him my story, about the book I found, about the childhood dream, and the feeling that overwhelmed me when I invited Jesus into my heart.

Tears filled his eyes, and he said to me, “You have been born again. The Lord Jesus has chosen you. You are now a brother to us in Christ.”

Then he gave me a new book—a complete version of the Bible, including both the Old and New Testaments.

I began to study the Word of Truth (the Gospel) deeply and learned how to pray not only for myself but for others, for my family who still lives in darkness, and for those who killed my brother.

I learned from the Lord Jesus that love is greater than revenge, and that forgiveness is the path to healing.

I stopped praying like the Muslims, stopped fasting Ramadan, and stopped going to the mosque.

My family began to suspect my behavior, which had changed drastically. They started asking me many questions, such as:

"Why do you no longer pray?

Why don’t you fast during Ramadan?

Why don’t you go to the mosque anymore?

Why have you started asking so much about the Christian faith?"

Every day, my family asked me more and more questions.

I used to listen to the news on the radio every day and discovered a Christian program.

I listened to those programs daily, and they were like a study of the Gospel.

Some of the programs were from the Lutheran Center in Lebanon.

I secretly made contact with the center by phone and corresponded with them secretly by mail.

I met with them secretly several times and studied the Gospel with them.

One day, I was with a friend who held Druze beliefs (a religion followed by people in Lebanon, Syria, and Palestine).

We were near my workplace when a boy and a girl approached us. They were from England and invited us to a party, then gave us invitation cards.

We went to the party, where the hosts were Christians from the United States and England.

One of them spoke Arabic fluently. I met him several times afterward, and he became my friend.

We discussed many topics about the Christian faith.

He gave me comfort and encouraged me in my faith.

I studied the Gospel with him, and in addition, I secretly attended their meetings every Thursday.

One day, while I was out of the house, my mother was cleaning my room and found the Bible ("the Holy Book") under my pillow.

She informed the family about what she found.

When I returned home in the evening, I found my family waiting for me.

They looked at me with strange, suspicious, and doubtful eyes.

Then they asked me about the Bible ("the Holy Book").

I was very afraid to tell them about my faith, so I told them I was only reading it to understand the Christian religion.

They said to me, "We don’t need to know other religions, and we don’t want anything about other religions, especially Christianity, in our home.

Have you forgotten that the Christians killed your brother?"

Then they said, "We feel that you have changed.

You no longer fast, pray, or go to the mosque (the mosque sheikh told my family that I no longer pray in the mosque and that I no longer attend religious lessons and seminars) as you used to do before.

Besides that, you have started asking many questions about Islam and inquiring about Christianity. Are you now a Christian?"

I could not deny what I believe in; I could not deny the truth,

because Jesus said: "Whoever acknowledges me before others, I will also acknowledge before my Father in heaven.

But whoever denies me before others, I will also deny before my Father in heaven.

Everyone who acknowledges me before people, I will acknowledge before my Father in heaven,

but whoever denies me before people, I will deny before my Father in heaven."

(Matthew 10:32-33)

At first, I was afraid to tell my family about my faith, but in that moment, I felt a strength that pushed me to confront them.

I felt that I had to openly confess my faith. I said to them, "Yes, I have become a Christian."

My family was shocked when they heard me say that I had become a Christian.

But my path was not easy. When my family discovered that I had become a Christian, they became very angry and expelled me from the house.

My mother cried—not out of sadness for what had happened, but out of a feeling of shame and disgrace.

I became an outcast in my neighborhood; some of my friends threatened me, and others stopped talking to me.

I was heartbroken, but I was not alone. The Lord Jesus was always with me, wiping my tears and strengthening me day after day.

That night, my sister called me. She told me that my family had gone to a Muslim sheikh to ask what they should do with me, and what should be done about me.

I was forced to sleep outside my home.

The next day, when I went to my house to collect my belongings, I saw a car parked near my family’s house, and inside the car were some people watching everyone who entered and exited the building.

They were bearded, looked like devout Muslim men, and sharp looks flashed from their eyes.

When I entered my house, I found all my family members waiting for me in an eerie silence.

One of my brothers asked me why I had come back.

I said nothing to him. I went into my room to get my things. My sister came in behind me, trembling with fear.

She said, "Please leave the house now. They will kill you. Please leave the house now."

I took my belongings and went out through the living room to leave, and one of my brothers attacked me.

I fled from the house. That car was still outside the building waiting (I believe those people were sent by the sheikh my family consulted).

When they saw my brothers running after me, two of them followed me. I escaped from them and ran nearly two kilometers.

I managed to get away and found a taxi. I took it to a friend’s apartment to ask for help, but I didn’t tell him the problem. I just said I had personal issues with my family.

I stayed at his apartment for a few days until I found a way to escape.

Yes, I lost my family—my brothers and sisters, my entire family. I lost my friends, my job, my home, and my country. But I gained eternal life.

I was a body without a soul, and the Lord Jesus gave me a spirit.

I was spiritually sick, and the Lord Jesus healed me spiritually.

I was living in sin, and the Lord Jesus saved me from sin.

The Lord Jesus saved me from eternal death, and He will raise me from the dead and give me eternal life.

My spiritual future was in danger, and the Lord Jesus rescued me from that danger.

I was like a ship without a rudder, and the Lord Jesus led me to the land of peace.

I used to smoke many cigarettes and couldn’t stop, but the Lord Jesus helped me quit smoking.

I was spiritually lowly, and the Lord Jesus lifted me up.

I was an angry person, and the Lord Jesus changed me into a peaceful person.

I was spiritually blind, living in darkness; I couldn’t see the light—the light of truth and reality.

There were black glasses on my eyes, but the Lord Jesus removed those glasses so I could find the truth and reality.

The Lord Jesus showed me the light—the light of eternal life.

Yes, everything in this world may perish, and everything we hold onto in this life can disappear. But what the Lord Jesus gives us remains forever. It cannot be measured by wealth, nor by position, nor by family, but by peace—the priceless inner peace—and He gave me a love that fills every lost heart.

The Lord Jesus granted me a new life. He did not give me chains; rather, He broke my chains. He is the God who carries us when we fall, encourages us when we grow weak, and walks with us even in the darkest circumstances. He is always with us in both good times and bad.

And if the world has rejected me, the Lord Jesus has accepted me. And if friends have forsaken me, He is my faithful friend forever. I do not fear tomorrow because the Lord Jesus is with me. I am not afraid to speak the truth as long as the Lord Jesus is with me; it does not matter who opposes me. What matters is that the Lord Jesus is with me.

The Lord Jesus, the great God, changed my life—my spirit and my body. (I have many photos as evidence, from before I became a Christian and after I became a Christian.)

O Jesus, my great God, thank You very much for forgiving me, for erasing my sins, for saving me by Your grace, because You gave me eternal life, spiritual healing, and changed my body, my mind, my health, and my entire life.

O Jesus, I will spend my life thanking You because You died on the cross for our sins. Amen.

"And I will restore to you the years that the locusts have eaten, the hopper, the destroyer, and the cutter, my great army which I sent among you. You shall eat in plenty and be satisfied, and praise the name of the Lord your God, who has dealt wondrously with you; and my people shall never be put to shame."

(Joel 2:25)

Now, after all these years, after all this suffering in exile:

I still pray for my family and believe that the Lord Jesus will work in their hearts just as He worked in mine, and will guide them to the path of light—the path of truth and life.

And finally, I can say with full confidence: I was born again and won eternal life.

You can change your thinking. It is best for your spirit to change and to accept the Lord Jesus Christ as our only and unique Savior.

*Note: surrat: means chapter in the Arabic language

Joseph Maria Christian